"But somehow I can't shake the feeling I might make...

....a difference to the human race!"

Avenue Q is hysterical. I saw it twice and laughed as if I hadn't played the soundtrack 4,000 times before...but I honestly feel that if I saw it now (and if so, better be soon- it closes on Broadway on Sept. 13) I would cry hysterically instead. I'm just that lame.

Lyrics time! Purpose, from Avenue Q, of course (oh and it's only part because it got really confusing with the mulitple parts):



PURPOSE,
IT'S THAT LITTLE FLAME
THAT LIGHTS A FIRE
UNDER YOUR ASS.
PURPOSE,
IT KEEPS YOU GOING STRONG
LIKE A CAR WITH A FULL
TANK OF GAS.
EVERYONE ELSE HAS
A PURPOSE
SO WHAT'S MINE?
Oh, look! Here's a penny!
It's from the year I was born!
IT'S A SIGN!
BA-BA-BA-BA
DOO-DOO-DOO-DOO-DOO
I DON'T KNOW HOW I KNOW,
BUT I'M GONNA FIND
MY PURPOSE.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE
I'M GONNA LOOK,
BUT I'M GONNA FIND
MY PURPOSE.
GOTTA FIND OUT,
DON'T WANNA WAIT!
GOT TO MAKE SURE THAT MY
LIFE WILL BE GREAT!
GOTTA FIND MY PURPOSE
BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE.


I'M GONNA FIND MY PURPOSE
COULD BE FAR, COULD BE NEAR
COULD TAKE A WEEK,
A MONTH, A YEAR
AT A JOB, OR SMOKING GRASS
MAYBE AT A POTTERY CLASS!
COULD IT BE?
YES IT COULD!
SOMETHING'S COMING,
SOMETHING GOOD!
I'M GONNA FIND MY PURPOSE
I'M GONNA FIND MY PURPOSE
I'M GONNA FIND IT.
WHAT WILL IT BE? WHERE WILL FT BE?
MY PURPOSE IN LIFE IS A MYSTERY
GOTTA FIND MY PURPOSE
GOTTA FIND ME.
I'M GONNA FIND MY PURPOSE!
PURPOSE PURPOSE PURPOSE!
YEAH YEAH!
GOTTA FIND ME.

Post Grad

They made a movie about my life!
...Okay, that would be a lame movie. But there is a movie coming out called Post Grad, and it's probably very similar to my current situation, but with a super happy ending that will make me jealous. And now that I plugged their movie, I think I deserve some ad cash, no?

You would think having absolutely nothing to do in July would be a dream come true, but I am completely losing my mind- partially because my dog is yapping in my ear right now, but mostly because I have no job and no purpose and the only person I hang out with is my mom (no offense, mom).

Not to mention.. did I miss the memo about the post grad 15? I already did that freshman year. Ugh.

Kvetch kvetch kvetch. Anyone have a job for me?

Let's be frank...

I am officially in a new phase of twenty-something-ness. I am now unemployed and living with my parents. Don't be jealous.

It is 4pm and I am laying in bed with my laptop and 2 out of the 4 dogs that now live in this house (I have one of my own, my mom has 3), and I am looking at the Occupational Outlook Handbook, hoping to find the magic cure to my life of unproductiveness (it's my blog, I can make up words if I so please.) I have no idea what my next step is, to be honest, but I want it to be a good one. I've made so many rash decisions in my day. I transferred schools twice (the second time was a return to the original school), I moved from on campus to off campus and back, I then moved in with my boyfriend of the time, then moved to NYC on my own, had multiple crappy jobs, and now I'm pretty much back at square one- Long Island with the parentals. Oh, and to top it all off, I am single once again. The only thing I have going for me right now is that I will be dancing my big tush off (somewhat, let's hope) in a local production of one of my favorite musicals. Let's hope I at least burn a whole lot of calories and maybe make some local friends in the process.

I did learn from this whole experience that I - A) hate living alone, especially in a shoebox, and B) hate people. Okay, that's an exaggeration. But in all seriousness, working at a restaurant taught me that I..well.. don't want to work in a restaurant. I have so many stories from just 6 months there, and all I did was answer the phones. Just the other day, I was standing at the front desk as usual, drinking a Diet Snapple. A little older gentleman comes from behind and says "Ya know, there are a lot of calories in that!" Ummmmmm. So I, knowing that I wasn't working there much longer, and frankly not caring either way, said "Um A- it's diet, and B- it's none of your business." People. The nerve. And everything was always my fault according to customers that called. If we were booked, if you had to pay for parking, if we didn't have alfredo on the menu. No matter what, it was all me. And just a little bit of info for all you non-New Yorkers- Broadway is an avenue. If you're going to see a show, and you make reservations at a restaurant "on Broadway," it does NOT mean that it is next to The Lion King. Just saying. It'll save you a lot of time and aggravation as you end up waiting 2+ hours for a table in the theatre district.

Honestly.. does anyone read this? I read something in a magazine about some lady who made $30,000 a year from blogging. That's $30,000 more than I make, so read on people...

"Tales From The Bad Years"

About a year and a half ago, I was involved with Goodspeed Opera House's Festival of New Artists in CT. I got to be in a wonderful show called "The Trouble With Doug," which had an awesome message of it's own, but to go along with the theme of this blog, I wanted to share about another show in the festival. Kerrigan and Lowdermilk brought their own review of twenty something kvetches called "Tales From The Bad Years." It was completely brilliant and touched me as a then college student, but even more now post-grad. I thought it was only fitting to share the lyrics from one of the songs from the show, "Twenty-Something" :

“Twenty-Something”

from Tales from the Bad Years

My whole life is right in front me.
I can go anywhere.
Two whole decades can’t prepare you for the moment,
When the page is blank before you,
And you’re barely even twenty-something.
Nothing’s standing in my way.
No one’s holding me back.
College ended and there’s no one here to tell me
Not to hit the bars and rent some cars.
I’ll fuck around
But then I’m gonna change the world.
It’s the generation twenty-something ascending.
We might be young. We might be poor.
But we know we deserve much more than what our parents have.
Who knows what that’ll be?
But we’re ready to discover
If there is life after the Wii.
‘Cause as long as we’re still young and fresh
And twenty-something, we’re free.
This is it. This is what’s hot.
It’s your moment. It’s your decade.
But you’re only twenty-something til you’re not.
Hurry up. Do it now.
If you don’t, if you blink,
Then it’s over.
Show me something I can get behind.
And I’m already there.
I have more free time than I know what to do with.
I’m in twenty different places
But I guess it’s ’cause I’m twenty-something.
Single with a bach’lor pad.
Now I just need a job.
I’ve got time to kill until my life becomes more real.
The time is now for wearing heels,
For roommates, drugs,
For chance encounters.
Raise a glass to the generation twenty-something ascending.
We might be young. we might be poor.
But we know we deserve much more than what our parents have.
Who knows what that’ll be?
We’re the target demographic.
We’re the reason for tv.
We’re obsessively and definitely twenty-something and free.
Don’t think about tomorrow,
There’s enough to do today.
I’m young, smart, on my way.
This is my day.
You blinked.
You’re not twenty-something.

This is it. This is what’s hot.
It’s your moment. It’s your decade.
But you’re only twenty-something til you’re not.
Hurry up. Do it now.
If you don’t, if you blink,
Then it’s over.
Don’t think about tomorrow,
There’s enough to do today.
I’m young, smart, on my way.
This is my day.
You blinked.
You’re not twenty-something.

Raise a glass to the generation twenty-something ascending.
We might be young. we might be poor.
But we know we deserve much more than what our parents have.
Who knows what that’ll be?
When you’re twenty you’re just starting…
When you’re twenty-four…
You’re twenty-five…
You’ll never feel more perfect when life starts at twenty-three.
Because we’re ready and we’re waiting
And we’re twenty-something and free.

To check out more of their songs, video clips, shows, etc., visit kerrigan-lowdermilk.com.